I got up this morning and I just wanted to drink my coffee in silence on the couch. The truth is, that reality might be at least 10 more years away for me before it can happen without any major disruptions. I know that, but I still think about it every morning. The idea of how inviting that peace, quiet, and coffee will be some morning is steadfast in my mind and probably one of my life goals.
But here is something else I know to be true. Every end goal has a series of “But… I don’t want to’s” along with a million other excuses before it. This morning for example, I didn’t want to make breakfast for the younger half right when my eyes opened, I didn’t want to change diapers and dress the babies, I didn’t even want to set up the coffee pot and I definitely didn’t want to put Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on again. But you know what doing all of that almost got me? Peace, quiet and coffee. The reasons I didn’t get that to happen were out of my control, the older half got up, the younger-half finished breakfast faster than I thought, and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse wasn’t on at the right time. The things that I could control did get me closer to what I wanted, even though I didn’t want to do them!
How many times does this play out in your own life? And what keeps you motivated to get through your “I don’t want to’s”? Or… are you not getting what you really want because when you don’t want to do something – you don’t.
It’s Sunday morning, the start of another week. What are your plans for this week? What are your goals? What will your results feel like? What do they look like?
Delaying your small self-gratifications for even just the brief moments in which they happen will get you closer and closer to your goals whatever they are. This is not rocket science but it’s a hard truth.
Do you really want to lose weight?
What is more important, the take out and drive through lines because it’s easy OR the making a healthy dinner at home even though you don’t want to?
Are you stuck in your job?
What is more important, improving your skill set, networking, and applying for entry level positions that get your foot in the right doors, OR staying where you are comfortable and don’t need to change much because you just don’t want to put in the work.
Do you really want to be financially stable?
What is more important, the façade that you can eat out with co-workers every day, the piles of Christmas gifts you couldn’t afford, and the debts you take on thanks to credit cards OR should you be saying no to these things even though you don’t want to?
It might be time to reevaluate what you really want. It might be that the long term results are not really what you are looking for; it might be that you are really just looking to live in the moment and not worry about your long term goals and plans. It might be time to get honest with yourself and it might be the time to take some action- even if you don’t want to.
Here is how my morning could’ve gone. I could’ve decided not to get up right away- which might’ve resulted in some colored walls, something strange down the toilet, who knows? And I would’ve traded those things for my 15 more minutes of sleep. I could’ve decided to delay the diaper changes and breakfast for the kids and just made my coffee but the trade-off would be possible diaper rash (if I do this enough), lots of whining, and lots of mess in the kitchen when they try to look for their own food. In exchange for that I would’ve made my coffee and sat in the midst of the noise probably working on a headache, and making the house clean up much harder this afternoon.
But here is the difference- I knew my goal was peace, quiet, and coffee. That goal was more important than the difficult, mostly inconvenient and sometimes mundane actions leading up to it. And, remember I said it still didn’t happen this morning? That’s because life happens, stuff comes up, sometimes you need to reconfigure the plan or sometimes you just try again tomorrow. But you stay the course and work the plan.
You bet I will be trying again tomorrow. How about you?